Judging by this summer season’s field workplace numbers, nobody cares concerning the motion pictures anymore. Effectively, extra realistically, the general public is simply bored with Hollywood’s infinite sequels, remakes and IP investments. However because the concept of a significant studio investing in an authentic story in 2024 is unhinged, let’s simply persist with what we all know: TV. A minimum of these sequels, remakes, and IP investments are literally good.
In fact, the largest launch this summer season – outdoors of Season 3: Half 2 of Bridgerton – is the second season of Home of the Dragon. Are you watching? Do you keep in mind something? Do you continue to know the distinction between Viserys, Lucerys, and Chrysalys? And are you aware which of these names I simply made up? Don’t concern. I’ve some unfounded predictions concerning the new season that may catch you up very quickly.
1. Rhaenyra and Alicent go on a crew constructing retreat
It looks like there’s no going again for these former ride-or-dies. There was nonetheless hope again when Alicent was simply slut-shaming Rhaenyra and marrying her dad, however then issues escalated when Alicent by chance ordered the homicide of Rhaenyra’s boyfriend and nearly stabbed her at a household assembly. That’s to not point out her son’s dragon casually devouring Rhaenyra’s son Lucerys and his dragon, Arrax. That mentioned, I nonetheless have hope for Rhaenyra and Alicent! Possibly they’ll all of the sudden understand throughout a women’ journey to Pentos that they’ve been used, manipulated, and turned in opposition to one another by highly effective males for his or her whole lives. Or possibly they’ll simply poison one another at breakfast.
2. Daemon stops being the Web’s boyfriend
It’s past me how Daemon turned the “Web’s boyfriend” after murdering his spouse, grooming his niece, neglecting his youngsters, mocking his dying brother, glorifying systemic corruption, and strangling Rhaenyra. Are y’all OK? Is that what you’re on the lookout for on Raya? I didn’t wish to flip this text right into a life teaching session, however I’m pondering it’s time for a reckoning. Both y’all want higher therapists or Daemon must spend all of Season 2 repenting and finishing neighborhood service in Dorne. Solely then can he earn the title of “Web’s boyfriend.”
3. Rhaenyra’s first husband returns underneath a mysterious new alias
Bear in mind when Rhaenyra’s first husband, Laenor, was “murdered,” inspiring a heap of assume items concerning the “bury your gays” trope? However then, shock, he was truly alive, inspiring much more assume items about these earlier, much less enlightened assume items? (“We simply didn’t know again then,” they wrote, one week later.) Effectively, there’s undoubtedly the likelihood that Laenor may return. When issues begin to get boring, he’ll simply sail again from wherever he’s partying – possible, the Westeros model of Fireplace Island – and stir issues up. I’m imagining a full Depend of Monte Cristo second the place he seems one night time in a Venetian masks, throws a lavish celebration for five,000 of his closest mates, and exacts revenge on Criston Cole for murdering his boyfriend. Then he’ll put out successful single and debut a brand new line of bespoke chainmail at Braavos Trend Week.
4.Criston Cole and Ser Larys begin a disaster administration agency
Talking of Criston Cole, we’re all rooting for him to get his simply deserts, proper? It’s nonetheless unclear how he was in a position to get away with a hate crime in entrance of King’s Touchdown’s most vital energy gamers, together with actually the king, with out getting punished. The truth is, he failed upwards in essentially the most spectacular means! He’s now Alicent’s bodyguard. That mentioned, I think about that he’ll begin a Higher Caul Saul-like agency with Ser Larys, a.ok.a. Littlefinger Lite, and change into much more precious to Alicent. (On this situation, Criston is clearly within the Mike-like “muscle” function.) In fact, all of this might be for naught when Laenor returns and ruins Criston’s fame by posting screenshots of his sexist and homophobic tweets from 2012.
5. Aegon pulls a Justin Bieber and retires at age 19
Aegon doesn’t even wish to be king! So why not simply let Rhaenyra have the crown? Wouldn’t that clear up everybody’s issues? (Effectively, technically Rhaenys may have solved everybody’s issues by torching Aegon and his mother in Season 1 Episode 9 as an alternative of all of the sudden creating a conscience after bursting via the ground and murdering scores of harmless folks … however I digress.) Simply let the famously lazy and philandering Aegon retire at Justin Bieber-age. Staff Black FTW!